Sleeping Beside the Underground

I am safe in London, which is gray. Grey, they would say here, though it looks the same. Owen tells me that last month was recorded as the grayest August in London since records started being kept. That is, not the coldest August, and not the rainiest, but literally the one with the least amount of sunlight. I always picture Londoners holding umbrellas, because I am used to hearing of rain in London. Maybe they should start making umbrellas with UV lights installed in them, like the one I put above Septimus's tank so his little turtle body would get enough Vitamin D. Picture all the Londoners walking around with auras of fluorescent blue coming from under their umbrellas.

Not much has happened here yet, but then I've only been here about nineteen hours. One of those was spent being detained at customs in Heathrow airport. I committed the crime of having vague plans. Airport customs personnel do not like vague plans. They went through my bags and asked for itineraries that didn't exist. It finally ended when I showed them on the internet confirmation of my return ticket home, and proved that I had enough money in my bank account to fund the trip. After that, they were quite lovely to me. They gave me tea from a tea vending machine (I kid you not) and told me Obama should have chosen Hilary Clinton for his running mate. I told them no, and they wished me a safe journey. Thanks, mates.

On the plane from Houston, I sat in the very middle of the very last row. Thankfully, the British guy next to me, named Ray, got up frequently. At one point we spent an hour or so standing in the food prep area in the back, chatting with the american flight attendants. There was one particularly spunky one named Antoinette. She said things that made the other attendants blush. After asking me questions about college, Antoinette turned to Ray and asked him if he would prefer an American Intellectual or a British Tart. As if we were that evening's choices for dessert. I went back to my seat, fed some music into my headphones, and took some sleeps.